Monday, February 19, 2007

quotes, poetry, and movies

"The greatest thing you'll ever learn, is just to love and be loved in return."

I've had that quote stuck in my head since yesterday and I couldn't for the life of me figure out what it was from or why it was in my head. It reared itself on the way home from Glen & Elissa's last night. I wasn't much in the mood to write publicly, so I wrote in my private journal instead.

I ended up writing a poem as well. I've never written a poem before - I really don't know where it came from. I have no idea if it's good or not, although I would guess it is not. :) Maybe I'm turning into one of those artsy-fartsy type people. :p I say that because I was in such an unexplainable mood when I woke up. Artists usually feel their work, right? lol Don't listen to me, clearly I have no freakin' clue what I'm talking about.

Anyway, so it hit me during the day - Moulin Rouge. *That's* where I know that line from! After setting up as much as I could on the new laptop, that's what I popped in, what I'm watching now. Have you seen it? It's really quite good. :) Of course, it's coming up on the ending so I'll be crying soon....sigh.

Speaking of crying, I've been doing that a lot today. Actually, all afternoon to be more specific. I received a disk today from people I knew a long time ago. The disk had some.....oh man, she just died. Wait a sec, I can't see that well.

Ok, so the disk had footage of Skootchie and Millie on it during different times in their lives. I've never owned a video camera and Skootchie isn't around for me to film today. I didn't even know these films existed. Again with the fucking tears dammit.

But now I do. I have short films of Skootchie, when she was a puppy. I have one of her and Captain, when they were both about 4 or 5 months old, wrestling with each other. I have one of her and Millie, the first night we brought Millie home. There's even a small film of Skootchie doing her infamous hide the toy game with a cow that moo'ed and a dog bed. There's one where she stole a pen and nobody noticed and another of her humping the cat. :)

But I have them. I have something to show people who didn't know her. This was my little girl, this was how special she was! I don't have to be afraid of my memories fading because I can just look at the movies and remember - watch, and remember. I've only watched them about 9 times already. I better make copies of the DVD - I think I'll be wearing it out. If I ever get the time to throw a portion of one up here, I will. Still pictures are beautiful, but they don't capture the essence that was once Skootchie.

As I'm sure you can imagine, my makeup is all down my face, my hair is wet from tears, and I'm a fucking mess. Time to say Good Night Gracie.

Good Night Gracie.


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